On Friday, I had to wake up at 1:45am to make sure Rosebro1
was at his high school to meet a bus to the Charlotte airport to board a flight
for a field trip. On Thursday night, in my mind, it made sense to take him to
the high school, go to the gym, come home to shower, change, and get to school
at 4:30am and get some work done so I could leave at a relatively early hour on
Friday. By 2pm, I regretted that
decision. I am not one that requires a
lot of sleep. Yet, when I get sleepy-there better be a bed and pillow around. I
was sleepy and wanted to nap. So from
2pm-4pm, I put on my best smile and tried to fake my way through the rest of
the day. Around 4 I had to go to the bike race downtown for a presentation with
my Spartanburg Leadership group. I ran
into several parents and talked school for some time with each of them. Then I
ran into an acquaintance who has a 5 year old and wanted advice about
kindergarten in public school or doing another year at preschool. I then had to
pick up Rosebro2 from spring football practice. While waiting in the car for
him, a person I had interviewed for a position came up to my car inquiring
about the job, another former JBE parent came to me discussing some issues
with her son. I then decided to go to my husband’s office and hide and lay on
one of the training tables until Rosebro2 was done with team meetings …surely no one would be in there. Well, in his training room, I found about 6
athletes, 3 of which were former JBE kids and of course I had to know what was
going on with them and then the stories started about my outrageous principal behavior.
One of the non-Boyd athletes made my day by saying, “Man, I don’t even think I
know who my elementary principal was. I
wished you had been my principal.” About
this time, Rosebro2 came and we left the high school. Rosebro2 had plans with
friends Friday night, so I thought I would quickly run into the grocery store
and get him a frozen pizza. What was I thinking….a student was in the grocery
store and I had to stop and talk for a bit, then another parent saw me and
stopped to ask about field day t-shirts. We got home and I quickly made his
pizza while he showered and then I took him to meet up with his friends. One of
the friend’s parents, has a son the same age as Rosebro1, we talked for at
least 45 minutes in the parking lot of the movies. Am I ever just Meredith or
will I always be seen and known as Principal Rose?
I finally made it home. I took a bath and then
snuggled on the couch with my dog reaching for my phone……8 emails
awaited me. I started reading the emails and realized that it was time to turn
all of that off. Answering those emails would wait until Monday. Then I started
thinking about that whole idea of “balance.” Balance, after all, is an IB
attribute of the learner profile, and should be something that I strive for
every day. Yet, with the end of school approaching and May being one of the
most challenging months as a principal and teacher, my balance seems to be all
off. Taking time for me should not include
going to the gym at 2:30am….or even my regular 4:15am. Most people look at us
teachers and think, “What a gig!!!” You work from 8-3 each day, 2 weeks off at
Christmas, a week off in April, and all June and July as vacation. What do you have to
complain about? NOTHING, and I mean NOTHING (well maybe messing with my kids)
will get me unglued more than that statement. Because let’s face it……we begin our
day at 7:45am (and at least once a week, you begin at morning duty at 7:30), during our planning time we meet with PLC, IB, make
parent phone calls, set up our rooms for a science investigation, plan lessons,
meet with our grade level, or grade papers, we spend our 20 minute lunch break
with 20 kids, at 2:30 we spend 20
minutes dismissing students, then we work some more preparing for the next day.
Many weeks we have RTI meeting until 4:30, faculty meetings until 4:30, parent
meetings, IEP meetings, etc. Then you stop by the grocery store only to run
into students or parents. Don't even get me started about what we do during our "summer vacation". AND we are the only profession where going to the bathroom requires an act of Congress.
So, what can we ALL do to create balance, continue to do our
jobs with outstanding results, and find peace within ourselves and avoid burnout? For starters, organize your to do list. Most
of the time my to do list has about 15-20 items on it. Some are easy, like
create the Monday Musing, or construct the Friday Forecast. Others are hard,
like create the summer cleaning schedule around moves and a summer camp. I am
quick to focus on the smaller items because they take little thought, I can be
interrupted MANY times while completing them, and let’s be honest, it feels
soooooo good to strike off something on my to do list. But I have started
putting my to do list in 3 sections-Urgent, Time Killer, and Easy. I tackle the
urgent first and then the Time killers.
I also have stopped multi-tasking. I have learned to say to folks, I
will get to that as soon as I complete what I am working on right now. I am not
going to lie and say I stopped taking stuff home. I still do and will continue
to do so…….but I’ve started using a timer on my phone. When the timer goes off,
I am done. It doesn’t matter where I am on a project or an email or writing, my
work stops. I gain so much strength from hanging with my three boys. They
deserve my time and attention and I need them. I also have stopped replying to
every email and I certainly don’t reply to ever email right away. And
finally-while this is another “To-do” list, I have started a gratitude journal.
I have it on my computer and almost each day before I leave I write down
something in my gratitude journal. Just like today, I had an email from a
parent who had attended an awards day program at our feeder secondary school,
and she was overwhelmed by the number of JBE kids awarded for various things,
but mostly for kindness awards. I am so grateful that she sent me that email and
that our work to maintain high academic standards continue while our efforts to
create outstanding citizens remain just as high.
As I finally climbed into bed around 9 Friday night (don’t
judge), I heard my phone “ding”. It was
a text from a JBE teacher. My first thought was, she should be at a soccer game
(where my hubby and her daughter were), and then I thought I am going to give
her a lesson on balance. But, I read her text. Call it being ridiculously tired
or call it crazy emotions from a principal who is a bit overwhelmed with work,
the multitude of heartache in my family lately, and the worry over Rosebro1
being in NYC, or call it midlife hormonal insanity, but I just cried when reading the text. Her text
showed me how she was growing as a teacher and how she never stops doing for
her students…even at 9pm on a Friday night. Then I watched a video another JBE teacher had sent me of what she was doing with her Friday club. I realized at that point that I
will never be just Meredith or Mom or wife or friend. I am principal…and I am darn
proud of that! I get to be the influencer of the influencers. Will that mean
LONG hours? Will that mean I can never have a glass a wine in a Spartanburg
restaurant? Will that mean I will never wear pjs to Walmart at 11pm like the
growing trend? Will that mean my family will have to bear being interrupted at every restaurant meal, outing, or shopping adventure in Spartanburg? YEP, that is all true.
And while I need to find a better balance in my life, more than anything I need
to embrace this wonderful job and realize that all those interruptions mean we
are doing something right. We are creating a place where families love us and
know we care about their children. So
while I will create more balance, I will also love what we are doing and
embrace the chaos....and wait to enjoy those 2 months of doing nothing (yeah, right?!)
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