Not I..........

On the two days prior to Thanksgiving break, our students participated in the Palmetto Bowl challenge.  Using coins, students voted for the team they most wanted to win the Palmetto Bowl (we even had a place for students to add coins if they didn’t care who won the Palmetto Bowl).  All of the money raised was to be given to Spartanburg’s HOPE Center. Because we had just finished our annual Boosterthon fundraiser (which was WILDLY successful by the way) and it was on a Monday and Tuesday before a holiday, I really didn’t anticipate a large amount of participation. I try very hard to have good rapport with our students and one student told me that she hoped Clemson lost the challenge and then asked, if they do lose, what are you going to do?  I thought on it for a minute and realized that I should just dress like a Gamecock if Clemson lost the challenge. 

During Thanksgiving weekend, Rosebro1 and I took the coins to coinstar hoping for at least $100.  Apparently Rosebro1 and I failed estimation in school, and were both amazed when the total given was $302.  However, I realized that CU had lost the coin challenge in a bad way… $92 to USC’s $211.  I realized that I had to quickly find a Gamecock costume and upon having no such luck without spending the $302 for rental, I decided upon my Chicken costume as punishment for Clemson losing the coin challenge.  As one who always tries to uphold my word, I donned my chicken costume all day- including directing traffic in the morning, during a parent meeting during the day, during classroom visits (I apologized already to those teachers), during lunch, and during afternoon dismissal.  That evening, not wanting to totally destroy the Rosebros’ social life, I did take off the chicken costume for Rosebro2’s school concert. I ran into a JBE parent at the concert and he asked me about the chicken suit. As we talked he said that he never can be too sure what I will be wearing as he rounds the traffic circle. Just two weeks ago I was dressed as Elsa, then Captain America, and I always participate in crazy hair day, pj day (a personal favorite), and any other special event any grade level is having. The father stated that he and his daughter often try to predict what I’ll be wearing as they drive to school and he enjoys the conversations so much with his daughter because as a football coach the mornings are about all the time he has with her right now. As he walked away, he stated, “you’re sure not like the principal I had in elementary school.”

I thought about that statement for the rest of the night. Was that positive or negative? Did he mean that as a compliment or was he judging the fact that I may be a little “less professional” than the principals so many schools have?  The more I thought, the more I realized that I was going to take it as a compliment? Yes, I ensure that our student recognition assembly (beginning of coffeehouse) is loud and exciting. I am as loud as I can get when showing excitement for our students. I play music at carpool. I take on every challenge to dress up, I make challenges with students (and usually lose), I dance with students, I will embarrass myself to benefit a child, I have been made into a humane sundae, been duck tapped to a wall (with a very bad ending), I’ve kissed a pig, I even watch their tv shows so I know the characters, I go to students’ church performances, dance recitals, and athletic events, I ensure I know every child by name, I sit on the floor and play board games with students when they need someone to talk to, I do breathing exercises with students when they are upset, and I can get onto a kid when they’ve made unfortunate mistakes. So that Dad was right. I am not like the principal I had. I do this because I don’t want a school like many other schools are.

My elementary principal, nice enough guy, was stern and scary. I never saw him except when I was “office helper” and he was always sitting in his office (and that was a long time before computers). He never spoke and I was so scared of him that I actually threw up one time when I was called to his office. I had actually won an award but even with that presentation he was somewhat cold and not at all enthusiastic.  School was the place I had to go in the morning and waited until my Mom picked me up in the afternoon. Until it became my social life in my teens, I really never enjoyed school. Of course I had two fantastic teachers who made me love learning, but school-not so much. I promised myself that I never wanted to run a school where children felt the way I did about school. I want kids to be excited that their principal wears an Elsa wig, will dance the popular dances, knows the characters on the Disney channel, will be so proud of your accomplishments that she will burst into song.

I don’t want to be “that kind of principal”. I want to be the principal that inspires, encourages, and cheers for our students. So today I am proud that I am not like "the principal I had."

Can we be as passionate about school as we are about sports?

Friday night I was so excited to be at Laurens as the SHS football team took on the LHS team in the 2^nd round of the high school league playoffs. The game was pretty close until the end of the 3^rd quarter when the Vikings got lucky on a muffed punt and then as they say the big “MO” turned our direction. As SHS pulled ahead by two touchdowns, tempers started rising. The other team was frustrated. They’d played hard. They’d worked hard all season…and all off season…. to prepare and they knew that their season was coming to an end. The refs and the coaches all handled the players with class and nothing serious occurred. As Rosebro#1 and I were walking back to our car, we passed the entrance to the gym where some of the LHS players were being greeted by parents and friends. It pulled at my heart strings as I watched some of these “grown men” cry. Rosebro#1 and I discussed this the entire way home from Laurens. He usually gets mad when his team loses. When he does poorly in a tournament, he has a temper tantrum so seeing this uncanny display of emotion from football players moved his as well. Saturday was Rivalry weekend for football.  I went to the grocery store at 7:45am Saturday morning when the only thing awake in my house was the dog. I decided to do a few others things while I was out and upon my return my three boys were camped out in front of the TV daring me to ask them to move and other than to refuel on food and drinks and despite a couple of bathroom breaks that is where they were the entire day.

While I love football, and I really do, I had no desire to watch football games sun up to sun down so I retreated to read a little in my bedroom which eventually lead into me napping. I was rather rudely aroused from my sleep from screaming coming from the game room. Mother instinct took over and I ran to the game room to find out who was hurt and how it happened. I discovered that the only thing hurt were the feelings of one of the Rosebros who was pulling for a team who lost in 2OT on what appeared to be a bad call by the ref. An hour or so later the coach blasted the refs in his post-game conference-which I understand to not really be acceptable coach behavior (but after seeing the re-play-I tended to agree with the coach). We went to a little party for the Palmetto Bowl Saturday night and I was fascinated by the reactions of the game.

I was thinking about all these reactions of the last four days and I thought how wonderful it would be if our schools were full of folks as passionate about school as they are about football. Our teams set goals-win the opener, win the region, win the championship. Do we help our students set goals? Do we have our own goals for the year? Our teams spend hours working together trying to get better each week. Do we look at our PLCs as a way to get better or do we complain that it is one more thing to do? We CHEER loudly when our team scores. Do we do that when our kids do something awesome? We high five when we go into overtime in a game. Did you high five your kids the last time we had no outdoor recess and celebrate that they have 15 extra minutes of learning that day? We chant our school’s cheer repeatedly at games. Does your class have a cheer or a chant or something that everyone understands to gear them up? We go to football games early and stay afterwards. Do you met students early or stay with them late ever to help them catch up, work on their projects or a goal? We read articles, blogs, fan pages on our team. Do you research your practice in the classroom? If you answered no to most of those questions, I would say you’re missing your passion for what you’re doing.  If you can have it in a game-whether it be football or any other sport, I would be safe to say you can have it in your teaching also.  Don’t you think our students deserve it?

Gratitude

Many years ago, I was on bed rest awaiting the birth of Rosebro#1, with little to do but read and watch TV. I became a huge Oprah fan during this time. One particular day, feeling very down about my situation, Oprah suggested, what at the time seemed like directly to me, to keep a daily gratitude journal. Again, with absolutely nothing to do, I took up this journaling idea in hopes to fill up some of the 13 hours a day I was awake and motionless and in efforts to get out of my bed rest blues. What happened is that not only did it give me something to do, but it turned into an almost daily ritual for the past 15 years. The transformation of my gratitude journal is somewhat amusing. Because I try to instill some of my better habits in my children, I have recently had them start their own gratitude journal. As you can imagine, a non-teacher assigned journal writing wasn’t exactly the first thing they wrote in their gratitude journal. I was thrilled that both of my children wrote “Mom and Dad” in their journals. This got me thinking about this whole idea of gratitude for those who love us and guide us.

    My parents were not perfect. They made many mistakes in parenting me and my siblings. Funny thing is they didn’t have perfect children either. They did the best they could with what we gave them. Being the typical middle child, I wasn’t an easy kid to parent. In my youth, I had a drug problem. I was “drugged” to school every day. I was “drugged” to church every Wednesday and Sunday. I fully believe that that “drug” problem prevented many real drug problems some of my peers seemed to battle- whether it was illegal drugs and alcohol or addictions of other kind-envy, gossip, body image, impurities. My parents consistently taught me and my siblings the value of education and the importance of faith. My father always taught me and repeats to this day that there are two things no one can take away from you-your education or your reputation. My parents reminded me daily just how important my education was. I was to work hard each day-regardless of the grade-because I was showing my work ethic and I was to always give my best because my best would be rewarded. With all the things my parents did right, this is certainly one of the best.

   I feel that my parents molded me into a person who believes, at my very core, that education was important, but it was my teachers who made me realize just how powerful education and educators really are. I had teachers who helped move me from poverty to prosperity. I had teachers who changed me from a struggling reader to a lover of all literature. If it weren’t for a teacher, I would have never seen my talent. None of this was easy. I made sure not to make it easy on any of them-my parents and many of my teachers. But I was lucky to have parents who cared and educators who understood the magnitude of their jobs. So in this Thanksgiving season, I pause to give all of my gratitude for what you do each day in the lives of students, their families, and our school community. 

Happy Holidays!

Decision Making

I have made no secrets about my enjoyment of Twitter. It isn’t a Facebook entertainment-like enjoyment but rather an instant professional learning community that I can enjoy whether I have five minutes or five hours. I am involved in several Twitter chats and on one such chat last week the idea of decision making came up. As educators we make so many decisions in one day. Some of those decisions seem minor- which line to use in the cafeteria, what color paper to use on the parent newsletter copies, or trying to figure out the difference between feeling bad and being sick.  We make big decisions as well- calling the parent over a child’s behavior, making a call to DSS over suspected abuse, changing a student’s RTI group.  With the numerous decisions we have to make in one day, it makes good sense that we are going to get some of them wrong every now and then.  Many times these decisions have to be made with little “thinking time.” I sometimes wish we were like the business world and could call a committee meeting when we had a decision to make. Nevertheless, we don’t have that type of time and we must make on the spot decisions. Many times we are making several decisions all at one time. 

My husband often gets frustrated with me because I occasionally refuse to make a choice at home even as easy as what to eat for dinner or what shirt he should wear if we are going out simply because I just can’t make one more decision that day.  On some days, my brain hurts from all the decisions I’ve made that day. I also would like to feel comfortable with my decisions once I’ve made them, but I am not wired in that manner. Even after I’ve made some decisions, I spend time reflecting on those decisions. This certainly happened with a decision that I had to make this week and it all reminded me of an issue last year.  One that makes this upcoming Thanksgiving so much more special to me. 

Last May, at 7:05am on a Monday morning, a group of students and their parents met me in the front office and asked if they could pray in the lobby for their teacher and her baby. There I was with less than two cups of coffee in me and I was having to make a decision. The decision was even harder because what the students and the parents didn’t know was that Mrs. Bryant, their teacher, and her husband were going to be saying good bye to their baby that morning. The doctors had told them that they had done all they could do and the family and friends spent the weekend trying to wrap their minds around what was happening and preparing for every parent’s worst nightmare.  Because I’d had a similar experience, the weekend had also been emotionally hard on me as it brought up deep dark feelings from my past as well as thinking of how to help the staff, students, and our community comprehend the outcome. Additionally, I fretted over how I could ever help Mrs. Bryant and her family know how much we loved them and how to help them through this tragedy. This praying group was persistent and I made a quick decision, mostly because I wasn’t ready to deal with the truth and I needed to get outside and open car doors, to let them pray and thought that while this was a public school, I would figure out how to deal with any complaints later as well as the idea that later that day I would have to explain to these folks that their prayers didn’t work.  (Don’t judge my faith-it was just how I was feeling at that moment)  I spent the entire car pool, thinking about this decision. As the day went on, I made a number of other decisions, as I waited for Mrs. Bryant’s sister to call me with the news that Camden had earned his angel wings. 

Yet, the day dragged on and on with no phone call. Around 5pm, I received a call with tears on the other end-yet the tears were that of joy, as a miracle had happened that day, and baby Camden was still with us and while many questions still existed, he was going to stay with us. I sat in my office chair, tears rolling down my eyes, and said a little prayer of thanksgiving, and afterwards I thought about decisions again.  I realized that in the end, I must remember that I have good judgment (most of the time), my decisions are always purpose driven, always respectful, and I believe that my God is ultimately in charge. Making good decisions is crucial no matter what your job is in our school. Your decisions have profound impacts on others around you. Just as I did that Monday morning, I urge you to make good judgment decisions based on the love of our school, students, staff, and yourself and not based on fear.  When you base your decisions on that love, this will always lead you in the right direction and just like baby Camden, you have no idea just how far you can reach with just one decision.

Happy 1st Thanksgiving, Camden. We’re so grateful for your story. We are so grateful for what you’ve taught us all. 

Let it Go........

Today was Movie Character Dress Up day due to the beginning of our yearly fundraiser, Boosterthon. I dressed as Elsa. My lovely sidekick (my assistant principal), Olaf, got the better end of the deal being able to wear a warm costume all day as opposed to my silk, shear gown. I also had on an itchy, scratchy wig all day (that didn’t fit very well). As I was thinking about dressing up as Elsa I started thinking about that comfort level. Comfort is something I really value. I value comfortable shoes (now that I am older). I crave my comfort foods. I love being in my house, on the couch with my favorite blanket, hot coffee and a good book. As extroverted as I am, the last place I want to be is at a social event-I’d rather be with my small circle of friends. I, and it would be safe to assume we, enjoy our comfort zones. This is probably one reason why we do the same thing over and over, we order the same thing at restaurants because we know it is good, sit on the same pew at church each Sunday, take the same route to school each morning, and it is why Elsa locked herself up in a castle for years. If you have no idea what I am talking about or you haven’t seen the movie Frozen, I’ll give you the Cliff Notes version. 

Queen Elsa discovers at a very early age that she has magical powers to turn things into ice. She has little control over this power thus isolating herself from the people and most importantly from her sister, Ana, until the day of her coronation in which she accidentally traps her entire kingdom in an eternal winter. Full of fear, Elsa flees to the snow covered mountains and locks herself in an ice castle (remember the cold never bothered her anyway). Ana follows after her because she believed in her sister and knew she could use her power for good. Elsa was afraid and refused to return with her sister but rather injured Ana. In the end, Elsa leaves the ice castle, stops the eternal winter, and saves many people’s lives, including Ana.

So why did Elsa lock herself into the castle? She was afraid. She was comfortable in her castle. She felt safe there. Stepping outside of our comfort zone can be scary, it can be hard, it can feel lonely, and it can also be the best thing you’ve ever done. I studied to be a special education teacher. I made the decision not to come back to work after Rosebro#1 was born and then my principal, Mr. Page, called me and begged me to come back to work that next fall. He had an ELA/SS position and wanted me there. I said yes with such reluctance. I was so scared going from 12 self-contained students to teaching 100 6^th graders. I was on a team with some of the best teachers who really helped show me how my years of special education made me a better regular education teacher. Then a few years later, my former AP called and offered me a job at JBE-my pick 3^rd grade, 5^th grade or 6^th grade. This was the school my kids were to attend. It made great sense to move, but it was out of my comfort zone. It wasn’t even on my radar. I was so happy and content where I was. My co-teachers all but packed my room up for me and I went kicking and screaming. I then moved to JBE and pretty much have had the trajectory of my entire career change since then.

That comfort zone is tempting, but much like Elsa that comfort will soon become a prison. I call the comfort zone the Danger Zone. It is in that comfort zone where we forget to grow in our craft. We forget to collaborate with others.  We stop reflecting. We stop learning, We also lose our passion. When passion goes away, a teacher loses so much more than a feeling inside. We are often asked to do many “new” things in education. Sometimes it is overwhelming. Sometimes it is frustrating. Yet, more often than not, it is exciting and fun. Stepping out of your comfort zone (or the danger zone) may be frightening, but the brilliant part in our world of education, is that you don’t have to do it alone. We have folks to get you out of the castle. You can never know just how powerful you are until you face your fears and see what might just happen. It may just be the best thing that has ever happened.

Champions

     It finally hit me a few weeks ago as I had some time to change my summer closet to my fall/winter closet. I put on more weight during last year than I had thought. It wasn’t a huge surprise. I knew it last year. I knew what was happening. Having two teenage sons who are highly involved in multiple activities, I spend a few hours every afternoon either driving kids from one activity to another or at an event my son is involved in which eventually lands us eating out afterwards. Last year was also filled with a tremendous amount of paper work, reports, and a tedious amount of “desk” work. Not to be one to sit at my desk very much, this was a tremendous change for me. I also discovered that the vanilla lattes at Little River Roasting Company, just ½ a minute from school, are better than Starbucks-and they opened at 5:30am just about the time I was arriving at school last year (thank goodness they open later). Then, with the exception of only 4 weekends last year, I spent pretty much 12 hours every Saturday and 5-6 hours every Sunday sitting reading, researching, and writing for the completion of my dissertation. While I completed all of this “desk work” I did what I always do when I’m stressed- I ate. And what I ate wasn’t healthy. As one who has been on a “diet” since the age of 22, I knew what I was doing was wrong, but had little desire or motivation to make much of a change at the time.

     So here I was with very little to wear and a huge amount of disappointment in myself for what I have done-willingly. I made the determination to start the 28-day challenge- no bread, no sugar, no processed food, no dairy, no fried food, 84 oz. of water a day, and so much green tea I thought I would turn into Kermit. I was 100% successfully on this 28-day challenge. Yet, the success on the challenge only took off 8 pounds. I was disappointed yet again. As I was detailing my disappointed to my most supportive husband, he suggested, with some trepidation, that it may be what I was missing was exercise. And you know what he was right.

     After this conversation, I was thrilled when Rosebro#2 asked me to train with him for a 5K and possibly a 10K. He stated that he wants us to do the Disney 5 and 10K next January (2018) and if we train for the next year, we could do it together. I am not sure which he wants more- to run with his Mom or have a trip to Disney-either way-I’m all in.  My next step was research. I am one that needs lots of information about anything. I researched the Disney 5K and 10K program. I researched running-although I used to run as a much younger adult. I researched shoes, C25K programs, routes, times. I probably could have gotten out there are run a 5K with the amount of time that I researched. There were few websites I didn’t explore.  During my research, I came upon a quote from Muhammad Ali that really stuck in my head- “Champions aren’t made in the gyms. Champions are made from something they have deep inside them-a desire, a dream, a vision. They have to have the skill, and the will. But the will must be stronger than the skill.” The thing is, I know what to do. I have the skill. What I am missing is that unstoppable desire- or will- to get this done and be the very best me I can be. It is called passion and I am thrilled to have my best buddy as my partner as I discover this passion again.

     As most things do, this got me thinking about our work here at school.  What does it take to be a champion teacher?  I agree so much with Ali’s declarative that champions aren’t made in the gym. I believe champion teachers aren’t made just in the classroom. This does not mean that teachers can’t give their best in the classroom-you have to-just as Ali probably gave 110% in the gym, but what makes the difference in a good teacher and a champion teacher is what happens outside of the 7 ½ hours of instruction. A champion teacher is passionate about their work. A champion teacher feels that passion deep inside. A champion teacher researches, studies, and plans for exceptional practice to take place in his/her classroom every day. A champion teacher has a desire-a deep seeded drive- to provide only but the best for their students every day. As much professional learning that takes place for teachers, all teachers are provided with the skill-it is the WILL that is missing that takes a teacher from good to CHAMPION.  Passion drives people to excel by challenging and pushing your work to your limits. Passion excites you and makes the work almost like play, fuels your efforts, and helps fight burnout. Your intense passion about teaching and learning in turn ignites your students to be passionate about learning. Without passion for teaching and learning, a good teacher will never be great. You can’t fake passion. That passion shows in all a teacher does. Passionate teachers are always in my office or blowing up my email with questions. They wonder. They explore. They try new things while demanding that even though the latest and greatest says one thing, they’re proven practice has shown differently. They can defend their practice with data. They are sharing their failures, they question some of my directives, they arrive early and pull kids or they keep kids afterschool, they demand me come to their room to see what their kids are doing, they share readings, websites, new ideas, they share during PLC, they love being at school, they stop at nothing to provide what their current students need-not just the same thing they did last year. They desire collaboration with other teachers in order to share and learn with others. They want to be better every day. They stretch my budget needing items for their class. Passionate teachers are the ones that our students deserve. Being passionate isn’t the only key to championship caliber teachers but it certainly is one of the most important characteristic.  

Tina taught me that.....

It is not very often that I pick up my children from school. When Rosebro #1 was the only one in school, he would ride with me, but when Rosebro#2 started school, my husband started taking them to school. Of course when they were students at JBE, they would come to my office afterschool, and like many teachers’ kids, rode home with me when my work for the day was done.  When they both left JBE, I missed those few moments in the car together each afternoon. Now Rosebro #1 either stays with his Dad at SHS, gets a ride home from our teenage driver next door neighbor, or begs for a ride with a friend’s mom to the golf course. Rosebro#2 stays at his school every afternoon for football practice and on Fridays he rides the activity bus to SHS as he has team manager duties for the football team.  So, it was very unusual, when on Thursday afternoon, I had to pick up Rosebro#2 from his school due to football practice being cancelled because of conferences.  The car line at his school is long. From a long way back in the line I watched curiously at the preteen social dance of activity taking place. I suppose I am like most mothers and worry about friendships, relationships and decisions of our children. It gave me some relief as I watched Rosebro #2 joke and talk with a group of kids as I slowly crept closer to the front of the line. As I did someone other than Rosebro#2 caught my eye. It was that of a former JBE student. One who was at best description-awkward, socially unaware of the consequences of such behaviors. This student had a teacher in 5^th grade at JBE that saw past the awkwardness and found joy. The work of this teacher transformed this student not only academically but emotionally. I saw this student with a group of kids, laughing and joking. It made my heart smile. What may have happened in the strange years of middle school to her had this 5^th grade teacher not worked so hard to make this student find her voice. It also immediately made me think of Tina. 

Tina was a student in my class 15 years ago.  We had a strange departmentalization of core content and I taught social studies to 4 classes and 2 classes of creative writing. It was so very important to me to teach these students the value writing could possess and how expressing feelings, emotions, and wonderings could hold power. I did my own version of writing workshop and spent a great deal of time conferencing with students, helping them edit and revise their pieces, and then building up their confidence enough to share. The community of our classroom was strong. Then Tina entered our class. She was new to our school. She was different. She hadn’t fit in to any one group in the class. The other teachers and I had discussed her- and her lack of work ethic- often in her few weeks with us. So imagine my surprise when during author’s share time, Tina asked to share-even though I had not even conferenced with her on her piece just yet. It was one of those moments as a teacher when you’re caught in a conundrum. The last thing I wanted to do was to harm her eagerness to share-this burst of enthusiasm needed to be celebrated, but I was terrified at the response the other students may give this new student; after all, they knew my expectations, they knew how hard I could be on them-she did not. We teachers have seconds to make major decisions-I so wish I could make non-educators understand this. I let Tina share- while silently praying that this would go well- for all of us. My other students knew that share time was sacred and I was proud, as Tina began, at their interested in her words as she began. 

That week in our mini-lessons, we had been working on hooks. I’d been using Disney movies to show how the movies caught your attention in the first few lines of dialogue and how those movies all began with a screenplay-a writing. Tina began with the words “If you could create just one wish what would it be?” I immediately bit my lip and a few kids even looked at me as they knew one of my writing pet peeves was starting with a question. Her next statement made that pet peeve seem minor when Tina continued with, “My wish would be to meet my mother.” Silence. I seriously could hear crickets breathing. She continued to read her words detailing her mother leaving her father when she was a toddler and that she did “Mom” work around the house-cooking, cleaning, and even taking the clothes to laundry mat-always on Friday night instead of Saturday mornings-when it was not so busy (a fact I remember thinking an 11-year-old should not know). Her writing, albeit lacking in complete grammatical and syntax perfection, told a story that had my class intently listening to every word. As she finished her sharing, her last sentence made a tear escape from my eye when she stated, “This is my wish so that every night I would stop dreaming about what she looked like.”  Tina took a deep breath and waited for “peer feedback”. What Tina got instead was a small applause from a couple of girls that ended with a loud roar of applause and a few “whoops” from a couple of the boys. Tina’s face will forever be etched in my memory as she brushed her hair, that she often used as a veil to hide her face, to the side to reveal a beautiful smile. Quieting down the class, I thanked Tina for sharing and noticed as she walked back to her seat, the manner her peers immediately responded to her in ways they had not 10 minutes prior.

 I realized at that moment-and in many more since then-that our job as educators is so much more than creating great academic scholars. We must create environments where our students are safe enough to learn and grow. Without that type of environment, our students can never be scholars. They will never find their voice. The lack of that type of environment, we harm rather than help our students.