Losing my Marbles

I asked my people not to get me a Mother’s Day gift this year. I was not wanting to really celebrate Mother’s Day, this first one without my mother. I wanted to ignore the day altogether. I wanted to wake up and pretend that it was just a regular Sunday, yell at my family to hurry and get in the car for church, pray that we did not get a speeding ticket on the way to church, get out of the car and pretend that I had not just screamed and yelled at my children for the past 1/2 hour, and then argue about where to get after church lunch. I don’t usually get my way. As it would be, my brother and his wife decided to have their baby dedicated to the church on Mother’s Day. Because my mother lived a faith filled life, it was the perfect day to celebrate her and her much loved first granddaughter. My boys (all 3 of them) didn’t listen about the no gift thing either. They purchased me an extremely special locket that I will cherish like no other. As the day was winding down, Rosebro1 texted me (yes...the 21st century) to come to his room. He had a gift for me. He handed me a jar filled with marbles. 208 marbles to be exact. I’m realizing every single day how much he is like me.  He had read something in his daily devotional about Moms losing their marbles. He told me that he knew he and Rosebro2 (and if he were telling the truth...their Dad) make me lose my marbles most days. He said that I would get them back and he handed me a second container that was empty. He told me that each of the 208 marbles represented the number of weeks I had left with him until he graduates from high school and each week I was to take one marble out of the full jar and put it in the empty jar. When he graduated, I was to receive all my marbles back. The weight of the jar had been burdensome until he told me that. At that moment the jar seemed almost empty and light not because I was soon to be free of him, but because I realized what little time, influence, and guarding I have left with him. My weeks-my days- are numbered with my children. Painful, yet sometimes exciting, thoughts. Rosebro1 was trying to be funny-and I allowed him that. It was later that I cried (sobbed really) and realized that I may be doing an okay job with him after all, but how I wished I had more marbles to give away. When I remember that my days are numbered, it reminds me to make the most out of every day-every moment. I remember to leave the paper work on the desk until the next day, help with homework, to play basketball in the driveway rather than watch TV, plan mom/son dates, go to church as a family, stop stressing so much, eat our meals together, and continue to tuck them in at night. 

As I contemplated my marbles, I thought of our marble losing at school. The last two weeks of school feel like an eternity. They are hard. We have so much to do, the kids are on shutdown mode, and we’ve had a full MOON for goodness sakes! But our marbles are so limited with our students. Our time really is so short. 180 days seems like an eternity in August when your new students don’t yet understand your rules, routines, and procedures and appear to be miles away from where you want them. But 180 days in May seems to have flown by faster than a jet and all we intended to accomplish didn’t happen. So few marbles to give away. Do we intentionally plan to give them away by giving all we have every single day? Or do we stress over the amount of work we have left to do and give them away by being less than our best in order to just make it through the day. If we are going to lose our marbles-and it is bound to happen– should not those marbles matter?

Draft Day

 I am a football junkie and I am a huge Clemson fan. Rosebro2 is no different. The NFL draft was a few weeks ago starting on a Thursday night. Rosebro2 and I had spent many hours discussing possible draft picks and scenarios. We had watched analysis, we made a mock draft, we debated each other's choices.  As it just so happened Rosebro1 & 2 had a concert the night of the draft. The concert was to end at 8 but ran over. A few minutes after 8 my phone buzzed and I saw a news ping detailing the #1 draft pick. I carefully watched Rosebro2. I knew his phone had buzzed in his pocket as well. One to follow the rules, he was caught in a conundrum.  Should he not look at his phone, or would his need to know who the #1 draft pick prevail. Even from the bleachers, I saw the panic in his face. I also saw the very poor job he did of pulling his phone out quickly from his pocket, the "YES" fist pump he made at his seat as he put his phone away. After the concert, we quickly drove home so we could watch the remainder of the draft looking for our Clemson favorites and when they were going to be picked.   

  As we watched the ESPN coverage, I was memorized by the way they scrutinized these players to pieces.  As the announcers were making predictions of who the next pick would be, they gave stats from the college play, their NFL combine, their weight, height, strength, agility, speed, quickness, focus, leadership, and their off the field character. They spoke of their weaknesses and what they needed to do in order to get better.  It got me thinking, what if we had a teacher draft or a principal’s draft?  Would I make round 1?  Would you be a first round pick? Now in the real world this would never work. When I taught 6th grade the first assignment I always gave to judge their writing skills, was to tell about their favorite teacher.  Not one child spoke about an easy teacher or one who gave little homework or showed movies.  What they described was teachers who challenged them, inspired them think, encouraged them and treated them well.  So no need to work on that 40 yard dash, but remember kids are counting on you to be worthy of their number one draft pick. 

#MayMatters

Last Thursday at breakfast, I was talking to the larger group when I said, “the first thing you need to do when you sit down is open up your silverware pack. We do this because everything in there should be used but most importantly your napkin because…” But before I could finish my statement, I was interrupted by two students who, having heard my speech for 6 years knew I would say “manners matter.”  I chuckled at the fact that these two have probably heard me say that phrase at least 500 times since they began kindergarten 6 years ago. I chuckled at the fact that I tend to constantly overuse alliteration. I chuckled mostly because I was pleased that while I’ve not taught them any academic content, I have taught these young men something. You see the cafeteria isn’t a traditional classroom, but I find myself being a teacher every morning. Manners are important. Using your napkin, closing your mouth when you chew, not making a huge mess, not talking while you eat, and how to compost your food and trash when you’re done finds its way into my cafeteria teaching every morning. 

What can I say, I am a teacher and that will never change. I was reminded just today of another alliteration as I watched my cell phone date change from April to May.  May matters. Many times we look at May as the busiest time of year with end of the year testing, field day, awards day, end of the year parties, etc. But what our real focus should be is pushing our students as hard as we can as long as we can. May matters.

I despise those mugs that read “the reason I teach: June, July, and August.”  Yes, the summer months are very needed by us all. It is important to regain energy, motivation, and even some professional development. Our children deserve the summer days of camps, swimming, vacations, sleeping late, and playing past bedtime. But every single minute with our students matters. We still teach. We still motivate. We still need to equip and inspire. We do this in May simply because May Matters. 

Jennifer Hogan is a wonderful blogger who I have been following for some time. She has started a hashtag movement this year entitled #maymatters. I encourage you all to use your social media with your May activities using that hashtag. I don’t encourage you to do this for recognition (or some of the prizes that are offered), I encourage because it gives us some motivation as we are planning meaningful activities for our students in the month of May.

My own children cannot wait to get their Xbox and TV back on weekdays. I don’t allow these things on weekdays during the school year (although I’ve relented for Thursday night football and NBA games….hey, I live with all boys). There are a couple of movies that are coming out this summer they can’t wait to see. They are both attending a camp and I am sure will have plenty of friends over as well as playing pick-up basketball games with kids in the neighborhood. Additionally, Rosebro1 has summer golf tournaments and Rosebro2 has football workouts. I tell you all this to say that our students are very much like my children. They soon will have two months of movies, tv, video games, playtime, hanging out, and being lazy. That should not start in May. There shouldn’t be movies in our classrooms, extra recess, or activities unrelated to learning. They will get so much of that soon. For many of our kids they are so close to reaching the next reading level or mastering that next math concept-why not push them to it…this also helps us in the fall. If kids slip during the summer, the extra push you give them now makes the slip not so far when August kids here. Our kids deserve your professionalism in May, because afterall #maymatters.